I break down on the roundabout in Basingstoke. There is a man there in flagrante with a car exhaust.
He asks me whether I'm dogging.
I tell him he's barking up the wrong tree.
posted by Geoff | 8:12 PM
Geoff's Dream Blog
Aegri Somnia
About Me
- Name: Geoff
- Location: Kent, United Kingdom
A 47 year old wet blanket.
My Other Blogs
For links to blogs I like, please go to my other, more popular blog, Contains Mild Peril (link above). Changing two lots of links is too much like hard work.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
I break down on the roundabout in Basingstoke. There is a man there in flagrante with a car exhaust.
He asks me whether I'm dogging.
I tell him he's barking up the wrong tree.
14 Comments:
Thank you for picking up the baton and diverting the attention of the dregs who have been populating my corner of the web.
Your reward is in an email.
I dare you to publish it.
Please post an item on "Celebrity Doggers." Thank you.
. . .and while you're at it could you do something on "Celebrity Goosers"? Or I suppose "Celebrity Geese" would do, at a pinch. The only memory I have of Basingstoke is of playing in the orchestra pit for a Christmas pantomime and being privileged to view from below the mechanism whereby the goose laid golden eggs. Your picture, with its overtones of ovipositors, brought this to mind.
Vicus, I do not dare to publish it. You know Top Gear is copyrighted by the BBC. But thank you for helping me dislodge the contents of my stomach.
MJ, the only dogger I know of is former footballer Stan Collymore. Why do you think I should know more?
Mr P - The only celebrity gooser I can think of is the Duke of Edinburgh. What makes you think i should know of more?
The bloke who plays Phil Mitchell on EastEnders...Steve McFadden. And there must be more. Please investigate.
Am I supposed to go out in the late evening with dark glasses, raincoat, and dog?
Just in the chance of catching an ugly soap star?
No wonder Steve's hoarse - all that barking.
Really, is it too much to ask?
OK, let's go for the Duke of Edinburgh, if you can't come up with anything better. I didn't know he was a Basingstoke man.
Seen the e-mail from Vicus.
What would happen if the car backfired?
I think Boris Yeltsin is a celebrity gooser. I'm sure I saw a clip of him walking past a rather stout woman from a Kremlin admin. department and her eyes popped out of her head because of his wondering hand.
I would have kicked him in the balls.
Didn't Ronald Reagan goose Margaret Thatcher? Mind you, they had a special understanding of each other.
He'd find it difficult to find any meat on that scraggy old bird.
I think we need to define our terms here. Is a celebrity gooser a possibly quite obscure and humble person who gooses celebrities, or somebody well-known for other qualities who gooses other people, even the obscure and humble? Or indeed somebody famous only for goosing? Or for being goosed? I think I speak for your loyal readership in regarding you, Geoff, as the fount of wisdom on this.
Just off to the roundabout.
I think the gooser should be a famous celebrity. Their fame, however, should not be due to their goosing expertise.
The goosee need not be a celebrity but must be human and act surprised when goosed.
Dogs? Geese? Haven't you people heard about the Aardvarks?
Post a Comment
<< Home